(Non)inspiration
Today I didn't even go to school. I have all these feelings and thoughts that I can't put into words. I can't focus on anything and I've switched tasks about a hundred times. Sometimes, I just feel useless. What am I going to get out of today? A day of rest? For me, a day of rest consists of Netflix and hanging out with people I care about. I tried to do the Netflix thing, but I couldn't keep my attention on any show for more than 10 minutes.
What I really should be doing is working on my scholarship application for college. I've just been feeling uninspired. How am I supposed to write a moving short response essay if I'm uninspired? I tried reading a book, but I just wasn't feeling it. How is it possible that a whole day has gone by and I haven't accomplished a single thing besides eating a bowl of cereal?
I feel like today is an off day. Doesn't everyone have those? You just wake up, and feel like you can't get out of bed because all these outside forces are telling you not to. Maybe those "outside forces" are my brain, creating an excuse for laziness.
I want to write another short story. I want to write a whole novel, actually. One with diverse, interesting characters who have more to worry about than romance. Romance is boring. Everyone writes about romance. I want something new, something different.
I'm gonna go try to be productive. Operative word: try.
